POETIC REVIVAL

  The Loss of A Precious Being My heart is aching  I can’t dull the pain I cant forget I can’t accept  The loss is too great I’s been a lifetime But the wound is fresh It’s still bleeding It’s still hurting  There is disbelief There is denial But the reminders Are everywhere Every second of every hour Every day There is no respite No sliver of hope  No panacea No miracle Just agony Just pain

  Why couldn’t I have I been simplistic, Oblivious, Happy for no reason? Waking up each day joyful  to be alive? Taking it all in, minute by  Fast minute. Going about my day without a care. Watch as wars rage on, for reasons No one remembers anymore. Let hunger and famine Wipe out countless  humans While I have food to waste. Let people be happy wining awards And congratulate each other. Let people feel important Uncovering old mysteries  And finding new answers. Turn  off the TV Ignore the news Scroll past headlines Watch only cute cats  And smart dogs. Watch funny people  Cover their pain  In  jokes older than time Let them sedate us into numbness. Forget about  Death and dying, the mortgage, The bills. Forget about feeling Insignificant  Knowing well we are.    

It creeps up on you   Overtime  in slow motion  Stretching  Unending  You feel parched Hungry  You become mute  It crushes you  You crumble into yourself  You’re pulverized  And  You vanish 

It takes a long time to become self aware Just to know where you are in life, To know who you are,  Where you came from And where you're headed.  You ask yourself  What’s my mission, my goal Must I have one? Is it worth to strive for To spend a lifetime on? At some point in your journey  You discover,  That there are oceans of knowledge to learn Will you have time, should you even try? There is no rational answer. At first, it seems finding love is a child’s play, Then after countless heartbreaks You stop looking, hoping, Or you settle. Then the questions become more urgent, Whats the most fundamental factor in life? What values are paramount? Will I find them? Do I need them? If I find my answers Will that make me happy? Am I happy? Am I fulfilled? Who said happiness is important? Can I be happy when millions are miserable? Why do humans exist? Is there a divine purpose? When will we end? It’s a life time of struggle To find answers Then your time’s up.

  A Speck In Time I said,"I feel so lonely" She looked at me with empty eyes And sipped her coffee. I sat there looking at my phone. I said I should go, I left my dog alone.

Alone, isolated, forsaken. Miserable. Burdened with duty, Defeated utterly. Powerless. Guilty. Guilty of feeling self-importance. Guilty for feeling this way, Surely, compared with the multitudes I have the least suffering. What's more, I am conscious of their misery. I listen, I read and see The tragedies that befall humanity, The devastation of wars, The loss of thousands of lives Loss of country and home The brutalities inflicted on innocent people. I see the insatiable greed of dictators That will not be satisfied  Even by the blood of children and the young. I witness the poisoned minds of zealots Fed by their false prophets Out to destroy lives, values and democracy. And I am one of the multitudes That feel this pain. I'm tormented I can’t be happy with my blessings, My fortuitous ordinary life. Because I am simply human.

Staring at the blue light Swiping from page to page Click click click In search of distractions For hours and hours Falling  into a tortured sleep Tormented by images Of terrifying spirits Foretelling  The destiny  I don’t want to see Every night every night every night

Insanity My mind was being pulled in one thousand and more directions So, I melted into the universe drifting in the vast   stratosphere , like star dust stretching so long,  Translucent, I was going to disappear. In a flash, A powerful  lightening bolt  came roaring from nowhere and hit me in my core. I split in two. And forever There will be two identical beings Except one is dark And the other is Light itself.

I’m sad summer is ending  I don’t like fall and winter I went to the beach only once Not nearly enough  Like millions of people  I’ve been a prisoner In my own house By Covid-19 Days have stretched long and lonesome  The monotony turning our lives into swamp We all thought the year 2020 was bad But in 2021 we’ve had more deaths  Fires, foods, hurricanes and earthquakes Someone is testing us But we endure  Like we have endured for 130,000 years There have always been wars, famines, plagues All kinds of catastrophes  But we go on Amidst all the misery and woes  Individuals may fall But humankind lives on

  I sit here day after day Grapple with myself  Refusing to do anything Useful Meaningful  Worthwhile. My thoughts are like a jumble of Multicolor yarn left over from Long ago when it made sense To knit. I’ve been missing human contact People, friends, family, strangers Voices, words, long sentences that make Perfect sense.  I don’t like this hall of mirrors  Where everywhere I look I see myself Only distorted Shattered  Broken  Muted I’m floating in a gray haze Nothing to focus your mind on  Nothing to walk towards   Nothing to aim for Just an endless haze.

  Sometimes Time is going by so slowly Like,  OMG it’s only 7:43 PM Or I am so sleepy  And it’s only second period   Or It’s only May 5th And I’m so ready for Summer! Sometimes Time goes by  so fast  you get a whiplash  Like, Oh darn my vacation is over Or Wasn’t I just changing your diaper And now you're choosing colleges?  Sometimes It’s as if you don’t have enough of it Time I mean, Like  OMG it’s 6:00 PM and  No dinner? Or Do I have enough time To do all I must do All I want to do All that needs to be done Before I die? Sometimes I want time to go by fast Like when I’m in pain And sometimes I want time to slow down a bit So I can smell all the roses I want.